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Saturday, January 13, 2007

A memo to my 9-month-old son

Just a few things, sweetheart...

1. Lying down in bed with Mommy for a 45 minute nursing session is not napping. It is nursing.

1a. It is especially not napping if you spend half the time trying to destroy the paperback Mommy was trying to surreptitiously read behind you.

1b. Dozing off during said nursing session and then only having the freaking courtesy to remain unconscious for ten minutes is not napping either.

2. Screeching until I put you in the backpack and then playing Kamikaze Baby once you are there is not particularly how I would choose for us to play. It's annoying. And it hurts Mommy. Let's knock that off, okay?

3. If I move more than one yard away from you in any direction, it is not necessary to scream at the top of your lungs and chase me, crying hysterically. I am just going to pick up the sock/turn on the model train/interact with your brother/retrieve your toy. You will be OKAY.

oh, and PS: Um, stop eating the cheese off the floor. It's yucky. Hell, son, it's even been stepped on. Hang on, I will get you some new cheese.

1 comment:

  1. Ah, the joys of raising children! Even though I only have one to watch... that little girl requires constant attention to make sure she doesn't faceplant into something sharp, or rough, or heavy, etc.

    BUT... all of the trials and tribulations are worth it when she comes over to give Daddy a hug.