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Monday, August 30, 2010

Swiss Miss

If the fabric is so dang gauzy that you can't reliably determine whether it's cotton, is it still called Swiss?

Let's pretend that I'm kinda knowledgeable about fabric and confident about that knowledge and say yes, shall we? At least for the sake of discussing this apron:

It's lovely enough, I suppose. But this is one in the "look, don't touch" collection. Not because it is delicate (which it is) or because it's vintage (that's never stopped me before), but because the bib is ridiculous.

Yeah. The top of the bib section hits right about at nipple level. And the width of the bib section doesn't even span the distance between said nipples. Seriously, what is the function of this bib? It couldn't possibly protect a thing. And as for style...well, the best we could spin this as is a little "lift and separate".

I do not need an apron to call attention to my boobs. I need it to keep various sauces from staining my boobs. While this may have potential use as a boudoir item (not really, I'm being sarcastic...I *swear* we do not role-play with the aprons. Now get that image out of your mind immediately!), it is useless as a functional item. Or even as a "hostess" accessory.

1 comment:

  1. My mind went to the boudoir concept at the very first pic. That is a rather useless bib, fer serious.

    I'm guessing this was a beginner stitcher who made it and miscalculated on the width of the top bib!

    I do not have an apron I like - at all. Sad, because I do like wearing them.